Everything But A Groom©

Jennifer's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her
    excitement -- not even her parents' nasty divorce.
    Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best
    dressed mother-of-the-bride ever!
    A week later, Jennifer was horrified to learn that her father's new young
    wife had bought the exact same dress!
    Jennifer asked her to exchange it, but she refused. "Absolutely not. I look
    like a million bucks in this dress, and I'm wearing it," she replied.
    Jennifer told her mother who graciously said, "Never mind sweetheart. I'll
    get another dress. After all, it's your special day."
    A few days later, they went shopping and did find another gorgeous dress.
    When they stopped for lunch, Jennifer asked her mother, "Are you going to
    return the other dress?  You really don't have another occasion where you
    could wear it."
    She just smiled and replied, "Of course I do, dear. I'm wearing it to the
    rehearsal dinner!"
    NOW I ASK YOU!
    IS THERE A WOMAN OUT THERE, ANYWHERE, WHO WOULDN'T ENJOY THIS STORY?

This is a story of love and stupidity.

A man was recently arrested after robbing a bank.

During the interrogation the robber through tears proclaimed " I had to I could not loose her!" It was a cry of a man in deep despair and the officers recognized true anguish and sadness in his voice. They decided to dive in deeper and asked, "Who? Did someone make you do this? Do you have an accomplice" The robber replied, "No"

Now the officers we very confused and continued to question him, the robber broke down and told his story.

It seems he was engaged to be married in three weeks. His fiance and in a fit of anger after discussing wedding plans and budget issues, told the man she would not marry him until his debts were paid off. He made the comment, " I would have to rob a bank to do that in such a short amount of time." She replied "Do it then, but we are not getting married until your finances are straightened out!"

 I guess he needed better directions because he forgot to remove the dye pack from the moeny he stole as he left the bank.  He then proceeded to try to deposit the dye streaked money into his account and pay off debtors, which led to his arrest.

The moral of this story:

Love can make you do very stupid things!

How do you decide who to marry?

A question posed to kids

 ( 1 ) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if  you
like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she  should
keep the chips and dip coming.
        -- Alan, age 10

 ( 2 ) No person really decides before they grow up who they're going
to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out  later
who you're stuck with.
       -- Kirsten, age 10

  WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

  ( 1 ) Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person
FOREVER by then.
        -- Camille, age 10

  ( 2 ) No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get
married.
        -- Freddie, age 6 ( Poor Freddie)

  HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

  ( 1 ) You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be
yelling at the same kids.
        -- Derrick, age 8

  WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

  ( 1 ) Both don't want any more kids.
        -- Lori, age 8

  WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

  ( 1 ) Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to
know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long
enough.
        -- Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)

  ( 2 ) On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that
usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
        -- Martin, age 10

  WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

  ( 1 ) I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the
newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead  columns.
       -- Craig, age 9

  WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

  ( 1 ) When they're rich.
        -- Pam, age 7

  ( 2 ) The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to
mess with that.
        -- Curt, age 7

  ( 3 ) The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should
marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
     -- Howard, age 8

  IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

  ( 1 ) I don't know which is better, but I'll tell you one thing. I'm
never going to have sex with my wife. I don't want to be all grossed
out.
            -- Theodore, age 8 (Watch out Teddy's Parents)

  ( 2 ) It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need
someone to clean up after them.
        -- Anita, age 9 (bless you child)

  HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

  ( 1 ) There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
        -- Kelvin, age 8
 And the #1 Favorite is........

  HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

  ( 1 ) Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a
truck.
            -- Ricky, age 10

I thought this would loosen up even the most stressed out couple! ENJOY!!!!!